


Partner Day

by Clever_Girl_22



Series: Akatsuki Gift Exchange 2020 Content [1]
Category: Naruto
Genre: Akatsuki Gift Exchange 2020, F/F, F/M, Gen, Konan is the sweetest, M/M, Team Fluff, Team as Family, holiday fluff, retconning the female Animal Path because hey she deserves some character background too, the boys are dorks and Konan loves them for it
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-20
Updated: 2020-12-20
Packaged: 2021-03-10 05:15:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 6,538
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27928879
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Clever_Girl_22/pseuds/Clever_Girl_22
Summary: It's Partner Day in the Akatsuki hideout and, while she is thrilled to see the rest of her teammates celebrating, Konan can't help but feel a bit left out. This is her holiday too, isn't it?
Relationships: Deidara & Konan (Naruto), Deidara/Sasori (Minor), Hidan/Kakuzu (Naruto), Hoshigaki Kisame/Uchiha Itachi (Minor), Konan & Nagato | Pain, Konan & Zetsu (Naruto), Konan/Female Animal Path (Retcon)
Series: Akatsuki Gift Exchange 2020 Content [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2092200
Comments: 9
Kudos: 32
Collections: Akatsuki Gift Exchange





	1. Partner Day!

**Author's Note:**

  * For [privatepenne](https://archiveofourown.org/users/privatepenne/gifts).



> Happy Akatsuki Gift Exchange! This mini multi-chapter is for Fauve; go check out their art @ fauvester on Tumblr (ugh, stunning stuff there)! It's a little longer for a gift exchange, but I just took the idea and ran with it. Happy holidays and enjoy!
> 
> For reference: the female Animal Path in this fic is retconned (because that just my thing now I guess) to a life where she never tangled with the Paths of Pain--I bet she treats Konan like a queen.

"Hey, hey, get up!"

No response.

 _"Dude,_ it's time to rise and shine!"

A grunt, but nothing more.

"Son of a bitch...and here I am thinking old farts like you _enjoy_ getting up at the ass-crack of dawn."

Hidan leapt out of bed, making sure to physically jostle his sleeping partner. Today was a big day, arguably the most important holiday the Akatsuki still had the heart to celebrate: today was Partner Day. No _way_ Kakuzu would be allowed to sleep in on a celebration like _this_. With a huff, Hidan turned and used all his might to yank the covers away from his partner.

"I _said_ ; rise and _fucking_ **_shine_** , you withered, heathen piece of ass!" He crowed.

Kakuzu, face tangled in an unruly mane of hair, scowled and curled up against the sudden draft of cold air.

"Hidan, it's five in the morning; can't you be this awake before a mission? Or before noon?"

"Oh, please, that shit isn't even important." Hidan said, jumping back into bed, "So, what'd you get me this year?"

He leaned over and pushed aside some of Kakuzu's hair, planting a particularly loud smooch on his forehead.

"Absolutely nothing." Kakuzu grumbled.

"Aw, don't such a stingy prick, ya' prick." Hidan cried.

"Very eloquent."

Hidan peered closer.

"Did you at _least_ make me a card?"

"Do I look like someone who writes cards?"

"...Kisame always makes Itachi one."

"Well, _you_ are by no means Itachi Uchiha."

Regardless, Kakuzu rolled over onto his back and titled his chin up expectantly. Hidan smirked, dipping his face even closer.

"Oh, _fuck_ no; I'm not that easy. Not with that sorry excuse for pillow-talk." He sneered.

Kakuzu returned the grin and swung out a pillow from under his head, so fast that the Jashinist never had a chance; he tumbled back to the floor, mouth full of fluff and feathers.

"How's _that_ for pillow talk?" Kakuzu snorted.

"More talk, less pillow. Asshat." Hidan retorted, rubbing his head.

Kakuzu rolled his eyes but shifted over, making an inviting space on the mattress besides him.

"Come _here_ , Hi-dan."

With a rather brazen smile, the younger immortal scrambled to his feet and hopped back in bed, nuzzling as close as possible to Kakuzu. Sometimes, all he needed was his warmth; it was a comfort that could make the immortal heart melt like springtime. Kakuzu let slip a smile as Hidan wrapped an arm around his neck, pulling them together even closer. 

"So, did you really not get me anything?" Hidan pestered, twisting his and the older man's legs together. 

Kakuzu, again, said nothing and cinched his arms around Hidan's waist, burying his face further into the albino's chest.

 _'Big-ass baby.'_ Hidan laughed in his head.

He brushed aside more hair and tucked Kakuzu's head under his chin, sighing as he felt the older immortal place light nips along his neck and collarbone.

"Can't you handle a surprise every once in a while, hm?" Kakuzu rumbled.

"Fuck no!" Hidan exclaimed, "I need to know this _immediately_ , ASAP, pronto, **_now._** Or I might, like, _die_ . Like, _instant_ death."

"Point made."

There was a pause; Kakuzu’s expression softened.

"...did you get me something?"

Hidan's mouth dropped and his eyes began to water as he howled with laughter.

"Oh, you withered-up _hypocrite_ : _'gifts are so **expensiv** **e;** they're a waste of **time;** why would you want to do something so **stupid?'**_ Huh, golddigger?"

Kakuzu scowled once more and moved to prop himself over Hidan, shimming his body to rest between the Jashinist's legs.

"It's proper to treat your elders with respect; gifts are tokens of admiration." He insisted.

Kakuzu then started to trail kisses down Hidan's torso and abdomen, his smirk only deepening as Hidan sighs grew louder and more obnoxious.

 _'Little brat.'_ Kakuzu thought affectionately.

"Hey, here's a gift for you--"

With a sudden burst of motion, Hidan twisted Kakuzu over and kicked him off the bed, the immortal landing with a loud **_thud!_**

"Dumbass." Kakuzu growled, now tangled up in the discarded blankets.

Hidan peeked his head over and licked his lips with satisfaction.

"What? Did you pop a hip?" He jeered, getting up and pulling on his pants.

"Come on, Zombie," He chirped, "Uchiha and Kisame are cooking this morning, thankfully. Can't miss out on them eggs!"

"Hey, Hidan," Kakuzu called.

"Hm?"

The younger man turned in immediate response, but was only met with another pillow to the face.

"Happy Partner Day."

**************************

Despite Hidan's incessant complaining, the duo still hadn't made it out of their room; they laid on the floor, caught up in each other and the now sweat-soaked bed sheets. They really couldn't keep their hands off each other!

"Heh, and it looks like _I'm_ back on top, once again." Hidan said triumphantly.

He sat on top of his partner, arms crossed, straddling Kakuzu underneath him. 

"That's because you're _exhaustingly_ demanding," Kakuzu replied, "Watch out Hidan; I'll come for you when you _least expect it."_

He held Hidan's ankles, slowly tracing his fingers up his claves, then thighs, past the abdomen and beckoned for his face. Hidan slouched further and put his cheeks into his partner's cupped hands.

"Sure thing, geezer."

He tilted his head, licking his partner's left hand; Kakuzu grunted in disgust and squeezed his cheeks.

"You're gross."

"Only for you, I am."

Kakuzu narrowed his eyes and flipped the pair yet again, pinning Hidan under his weight. The younger immortal simply yawned and stretched his arms, folding them behind the back of his head. He propped his knees up, Kakuzu leaning against them for support.

"You're a dick, y'know that?" Hidan snarked.

"Hm, are you referring to--what do you and Deidara call it? _'big-dick energy'_ ?" Kakuzu mused.

"Hah! Your big-dick energy comes from _being_ a big dick, not from actually _having_ one."

"If you say so; though, if that’s the case, that little tic-tac of yours has no right to compete, then."

Hidan sputtered out a few shoddy insults as Kakuzu rose, reaching a hand out to his partner.

"I need to shower," He said, his face suddenly shading red, "Are you coming?"

Hidan broke out into a wide grin.

"Shit, Kuzu, you don't have to ask me twice!" he cried.

He bounded to his feet and out the door, still naked.

"Oi, Kisame! Get your fishy ass out of here! You too, no Danna; Kakuzu and I need space to make some _unholy,_ sweet love for the third time this morning!"

Kakuzu mumbled something complanative, but smiled to himself. He'd make sure to give the little masicopath his gift soon enough.


	2. A Celebration...

In the kitchen, Konan worked at the stove, helping Itachi and a rather disgruntled Kisame finish up breakfast. The pair had, per unspoken custom, risen early to prepare a team breakfast, starting their day just as Konan rose to complete her morning meditation. Typically, Itachi and Kisame were efficient in their work, but today had been slowed by...other interruptions.

"Thanks, Ko, I'm sorry you always have to pick up after us." Kisame said, "Those undead jackasses just have the _best_ time invading others' space."

"Oh, it's alright; it _is_ a holiday after all." Konan replied.

She and Kisame were clearing off the counters and oven while Itachi worked at the sink, tackling the mounds of dishes they had compiled.

"Oh, we know." Itachi stated, snapping his latex dishwashing gloves for fun.

Konan grabbed a discarded towel and bent down, peering at the last pie still in the oven. 

"So, what do you two have planned for today?" She asked cheerfully.

Kisame and Itachi exchanged a bashful look. Though they were not the newest pairing of the Akatsuki, their romance had been the most recent to bloom, making this year's Partner Day only their third.

"Well, we both agreed on keeping it modest again this year, right?" Itachi asked.

Kisame nodded encouragingly.

"Of course," He replied, running a soapy hand through his hair, "Let the others go all out; _we_ don't need that."

Konan continued to smile; unbeknownst to either of them (or any of the Akatsuki in general), she had helped them all with each other's gifts. Being the team's Sensory Type, as well as an class-A observer, the origami ninja knew just how to assist the men in their festivities. The day would surely warrant many surprises. Even so much had already occured: a massive amount paper-thin wooden roses and clay doves from Sasori and Deidara, a trail of sweet, sincere love letters between Kisame and Itachi, the increase in lovemaking between Kakuzu and Hidan leading up to the holiday...and it was barely mid-morning!

 _'They wait all year for this, anyways.'_ Konan told herself.

It was pleasant, it was peaceful, and it was always the happiest Konan felt all year. Nothing could brighten her mood like seeing her mismatched family get along.

"I'm going to go grab Sasori no Deidara," She announced, "Make sure you keep your eyes on the fruit pie; it's basal temp. is not quite where it needs to be yet."

Konan untied her apron and left the kitchen, sighing happily as she heard Kisame and Itachi continue to pleasantly chat about cooking and team gossip. They were perfect for each other--all the pairings were, if she was being honest with herself. Konan and Nagato had done a fantastic job assigning teams, despite the frequent bickering that filled their Ame base. Every single one of them were an exemplary match for each other and--though she'd never tell anyone--it filled Konan with joy seeing the gradual abundance of romance that had flooded their dwelling.

Konan passed through the base's dining room; if she knew them any better, the two artists of the Akatsuki had been up even earlier than her and Kisame and Itachi, busily puttering around their conjoined makeshift art studio. She rounded the corner and pushed open the door.

"Good morning; breakfast is going to be done soon, so make sure you're-- **_ah!"_ **

Konan shielded her eyes: Deidara and Sasori sat together--completely nude--on a pair of high stools. A few feet away, a pair of miniature puppets worked, one with molding clay and another with a sketchpad. Upon Konan's entry, the duo flushed immediately, turning an embarrassed shade of red. 

"Oh, Konan, hn!" Deidara exclaimed, "We weren't expecting any...intruders."

He moved to cover himself in a huff, while Sasori sighed and simply crossed his arms in mild annoyance.

"Sorry, Konan; Dei and I got behind in our work and thought it would be romantic to finish our presents together." He replied.

Konan sighed, averting her eyes. Of course they'd be up to something like this. 

"Well, I'm glad that you are both enjoying your morning together. Kisame and Itachi are almost done; be quick." She stated.

Before retreating, Konan popped her head back in, startling a stream of complaints from the duo.

"Make sure you actually remember to put clothes on this time, _both_ of you!"

The two artists looked at each other and rolled their eyes, twittering away after saying something tastefully snobbish. However, Konan was right; there had been plenty of times thus far where Sasori and Deidara (and Hidan, but his nakedness was a personality trait if anything) had come to group meetings half-dressed and in the middle of some type of eoritc art session. 

In her eyes, Sasori no Deidara (what Konan and the rest of the team had come to call them) could do no wrong; though they were both unhinged criminals, their dynamic was the most prominent and the most enamoring of the franchise. Sasori and Deidara cared for each other at a depth that Konan could only describe as utter adoration: they worshipped each other, complemented each other, and collaborated almost as smoothly as Kisame and Itachi, despite their difference in philosophies.

 _'Their gifts are going to be so dramatic. Absolutely dramatic.'_ Konan mused to herself.

The holiday had first been created as a segway for Deidara's initiation, where the poor boy had no idea what to expect from the Akatsuki. Nagato had assumed such celebrations would make newer members feel included and improve team relationships as a whole.

"We were surely successful with that." Konan mumbled, her smile growing bigger.

The origami ninja was happy to see her boys happy, every last one of them--even Zetsu. Which reminded her: she had to speak with him regarding some flora anatomy. She'd bother him later, though; entering the dining hall, Konan could see that the table had been set. 

"Did you grab the two pixies?" Kisame asked.

He and Itachi were currently laying out food and utensils for everyone.

"The more important question is if our Zombie Combo has, ah, _risen_ from their love dungeon." Itachi added, pointing a fistful of serving tongs descriptively.

"Of course we have! Risen like the motherfucking _dead,_ as always!"

Hidan and Kakuzu trailed behind Konan, Sasori and Deidara filing in last.

"Oh, hn, I can't believe Uchiha could make something so good!" Deidara cried.

"Yes, Itachi and Kisame did lovely." Sasori said, nodding in agreement.

He headed into the kitchen for wine, fetching Hidan one of his own bottles of vodka, much to the rest of the group's dismay. Once Zetsu arrived, the Akatsuki seated themselves. Finally, the Pein Tendo appeared.

"Good morning, everyone; no roll call is necessary. Today is all about the compassion and loyalty we share amongst ourselves," He began methodically, "So, that being said, I wish you all longevity in your partnerships, as well as peace and prosperity."

The Akatsuki broke into light cheers of agreement, looking to their leader continue. Konan ducked her head and smiled to herself.

"I am, as always, eternally grateful for you and all the hard work you have accomplished under our name--let us have a grand holiday."


	3. ...For All?

Sometime sooner than later, when all eating had nearly sufficed, the Pein Tendo motioned for Konan to give way to her presentation.

"Gentlemen," She announced, "For this year, I chose the theme 'Tokens of Affection'; you all can describe some sort of affection to your partners, so I imagine this might have been easier than other prompts. So, who would like to start?"

Surprisingly, Itachi raised his hand, volunteering to present first. With a note of shyness, he offered Kisame a bound booklet of personally written haikus. In turn, the shark-man gave his partner a small leather journal, embroidered with his first name and bursting with pristine, empty pages. Hidan was next, boasting a rather high-tech calculations device and bragged of the 'amazing deal' he had to come across the gadget (he had told everyone he killed a man over it). Needless to say, Kakuzu was greatly impressed. The older immortal in turn gave Hidan a truly surprising gift: a small Jashinist talisman from Yugakure, the deadly triangle symbol etched deep in the iron trinket. 

Konan smiled; it was a cheap gift, but loaded with sincerity. Hidan was crawling all over Kakuzu, praising him with a mixture of mockery and gratitude.

Sasori and Deidara, besides their elaborate pieces from earlier, presented each other with their usual art supplies, a delicate clay jar for puppet-man’s tools and an ornate wooden box for the terrorist's makeup. To end the exchange, the Pein Tendo presented Konan with a chakra necklace. Lovely. _Another_ chakra necklace...it would be added to her hefty collection. Though she accepted it with grace, the origami ninja couldn't help but feel a slight stab of disappointment.

Why? She couldn't quite tell. Or she didn't want to.

 _'No matter. It's their holiday anyways.'_ She told herself, but her smile felt sadder than before.

As always, Konan enjoyed Partner Day, but as the celebration wore on, she couldn't help but feel a tad lonely. Here were her boys, her precious teammates, enjoying each other's company in an unprecedented pleasent fashion, yet here she was, sullen and distant. It had washed over her so fast.

Yes, her and Nagato never kindled anything more than kindred love, sure, but they cared for each other fiercely. And, yes, it was enough--it truly was--but Konan knew her adoptive brother couldn't give her the affection she sometimes desperately craved. He wasn't Yahiko--he couldn't love her the same way.

"Konan, you wanted to see me?"

Konan currently stood at the doorway of Zetsu's greenery, the plant-man peeking his head out in hushed greetings.

Should she talk to him of her sudden feelings? After all, he was the only member of the Akatsuki to remain partner-less; maybe he could provide her with similar insight.

"Yes, I was curious as to if I can potentially expand my origami camouflage skills to larger forms of flora and fauna. I need reference documents to study," She explained, "It might become useful to mimic larger organisms such as trees."

Zetsu nodded and invited Konan in. The plant-man's room was unlike any other: full-panel sun windows, grass instead of carpet, vines, flowers, and an array of bumbling bugs filling the room; a steam burbled in a corner, next to what Konan assumed was a miniature koi pond. It was breathtaking, if she was being honest.

"I'd suggest studying an oak species over maple, since their boles tend to be sturdier and thicker in diameter. There's also a greater density distribution in the area, " Zetsu droned, "I also suggest focusing on mimicking reflective species such as the Paper Birch and White Poplar; they match your sheets nicely."

Konan nodded along to his words, but her mind was elsewhere.

"Zetsu, do you ever feel...lonely?"

Zetsu paused in his search for scrolls and gave her a puzzled look.

"I do not get lonely. I am perfectly self-sufficient," He remarked, "Do you?"

Konan wanted to say no, to dismiss the question completely. But, that would only make her look silly.

"I believe so." She admitted.

"Well, why so? You have Leader as your partner--surely, there is some sort of affectionate connection between you two?" Zetsu asked.

He then sat on the bed made of marimo moss and motioned for Konan to join him.

"Pein and I care deeply for each other. We do love each other, in some sort of way..."

"But it is not the type of love you are craving?"

_'No. No it wasn't.'_

Though she had unconsciously convinced herself for years otherwise, Konan knew Nagato could never be Yahiko.

"You've spent too much time fussing over us to ever allow yourself a chance to understand this inside yourself." Zetsu added.

Was that true? It made sense; Konan spent most of her energy on the Akatsuki, playing big sister for all the men in her team. She never really _had_ the time to reflect on her own needs.

"It's none of their faults." She said softly

Zetsu nodded but said nothing. Could she ever find that connection--that romance--she was so blessed to have found in Yahiko with Nagato, though? Could she experience the same sense of happiness all the other pairs were celebrating today?

_'I need to speak with Nagato.'_

"You should talk to Leader," the planet-man suggested, "Maybe he will reciprocate your feelings."

Konan nodded and stood. Maybe talking to Nagato would bring forth clarity. She thanked Zetsu for the scrolls and the advice, heading off in search of her partner.

**********************************

"Do _I_ ever feel lonely?"

"Yes; I know I do."

They sat in Nagato's room, hidden away from the rest of the Akatsuki's eyes. He was still attached to his respirator, but the Pein Tendo lay dormant in its cryochamber. Shakily, he poured himself and his angel some herbal tea.

"Ko, of course I am," He explained pleasantly, "I _wish_ I could reveal myself, spend time with all of you instead of sending a replacement in my place. You are all _wildly_ entertaining."

"Of course, dear, I understand...do you think we could think we could ever have what the others have?"

Konan scowled internally; her words sounded too desperate. Nagato took a slow sip and looked back at her with his unnerving eyes.

"Ko, you know you can't use me to replace Yahiko. I already do so in physical form--any other way is simply too much to bear."

Of course she knew this! But still, Konan felt her cheeks warm under a few stray tears.

 _'Who is there for me then?'_ She lamented internally. 

Nagato, setting down his tea and ungracefully letting some droplets plunge from the mug, grasped her pale hands. He laced their fingers together, just as he always did when he comforted her. He gave her a weak smile.

"You _know_ I could never live up to Yahi." He stated, "Nobody can."

So, was that it, then?

Konan felt tears increase in their flow; was she doomed of her life feeling incomplete? She couldn't wait like Sasori did, or have the patience Kakuzu or Itachi had. Yahiko was her first love; better to settle with her solitary fate than pine for a lesser replacement.

"Ko, you don't need to replace Yahiko. Just try to find someone whom you enjoy their company and makes you happy within." Nagato reaffirmed.

Silently, Konan wiped away her own tears. Maybe he was right.

"Thank you, Nagi," She replied, "I appreciate you."

She checked at the nearby clock: three o'clock sharp. She'd have to gather up someone to accompany her to the Ame marketplace for the evening's celebratory dinner. There, she could continue with her resolve.

"And I appreciate you too, _so_ much." 

With a small kiss to the forehead, Konan bid Nagato goodbye and headed downstairs. She had a lot of thinking to do.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fun Fact: all these little tree factoids from Zetsu are trees I can identify by sight! Super dorky, but as a field science major, it's super important to be able to identity flora/fauna by the naked eye. I imagine Zetsu would have enjoyed the Forest Ecology lab I took this semester...


	4. But a Little Push...

"Are you sure we need _this_ much tofu? We're only shopping for tonight."

Yes, hn; you know Zetsu's gonna eat it all."

"But Kakuzu gave us a budget."

"So? We can always just _steal_ stuff, hn."

"...that's unethical."

Konan was peering through the produce section, digging through the mounds of tomatoes and peppers in search of suitable specimens. Deidara, who was pulling their cart, kicked at some discarded customer receipts and sighed loudly.

"What else is on the list?" He demanded.

Without looking up, Konan shoved her hand into one of her pockets and pushed the folded list to him, keeping her eyes busy with the vegetables. She was distracted; Nagato's (and Zetsu's) words were still occupying a greater portion of her concentration. 

She didn't want to replace Yahiko--at least , that was not her intention. What they had shared, though it was so painfully brief, had taught the origami ninja the strongest of desires and the most fleeting of grievances. Yahiko was her first love. He was her only love, it seemed. Nagato loved her, yes, but they both knew their adoration for each other came from their collective desire to protect their dreams from their hellish life they now called normalcy, on top of their fierce sense of kinsmanship. It was nothing more than familial love, sibling sentiments.

Konan singled out a green pepper and poked it with her nails. It seemed firm enough. With a toss, she sent the produce into the cart. She had her boys; her role was among them. She didn't need to indulge in her own foolish infatuations.

"Hey, Konan, hn, you there?" 

Deidara, who had wandered off to grab spices, suddenly peered over her shoulder. He held the list out expectantly.

"You alright?"

Konan, abashed, shook her head. 

_'Dei is so young...he has Sasori...he wouldn't understand...'_ She decided.

"Yes; what did you say?" She asked.

Deidara leaned against the cart, looking unconvinced.

"Hmpfh! I _asked_ if we'd need extra miso broth," He stated, "What's bothering you, hn?"

The duo left the fresh produce section, scanning the butcher shop and the fish stand for any of the bargains that matched Kakuzu's couponing binder. 

Really, should she tell him?

"Dei," Konan sighed, "You are still too young to realize this, but sometimes a person only has one chance at finding their partner. It's out of our mere mortal--and immortal--control who become cherishable in our own eyes. Nobody has control over that. And nobody has control of when your loved ones are taken away too soon..."

Konan, in spite of herself, thought she was going to cry, right here, right now.

_'Control yourself; Deidara should not see you have an episode in the middle of the Hidden Rain market town....none of them should ever see you lose it; you are stoic in their eyes. In all of their eyes.'_

Konan repeated this thought, over and over until she felt reassured enough to resume the conversation. Meanwhile, Deidara had quitted, the other shoppers looking curiously at the two criminals standing in the middle of the aisle. No, Konan was steady and unwavering...but she didn't always want to be. But, then again, wasn't that what Yahiko had made her out to be?

"Konan, it's, like, _okay_ to feel sad," Deidara mumbled, "You don't have to be brave today. You don't have to be brave for us, hn, when you don't get to celebrate Partner Day like the rest of us."

Like a child comforting it's elder sibling, his fingers ghosted against Konan's hand and gave a quick but reassuring squeeze. Finally, the origami ninja took her eyes off Kisame's shopping list and looked at her accomplice. 

"It's okay to try again. y'know."

It was, it really was! Konan had her whole life ahead of her--surely, there was still someone out in the shinobi world who could fill the hole in her heart. Surely, this was possible. Konan felt a rush of joy, but it was quickly dampered.

_'Think of the complications, though.'_

The little voice inside her head was right; whatever lover she came across would be (unknowingly, perhaps), putting themselves in danger. The Akatsuki did not commit long term relations with outsiders; this ensured the secret of their survival. Besides, unnecessary casualties always follow--not even peacemaker Konan, the Angel of Ame, could change _that_.

"Oh, Konan, _look."_

Deidara yanked on her sleeve and pointed conspicuously at a miniature flower shop. Behind the stand's counter, a handsome, young man stood, exchanging a bouquet of orientals with a customer. But the duo's eyes were drawn elsewhere.

"Oh, my; she is **_lovely."_ **

A woman, no older than Konan herself, worked offsides, hands darting across a massive display of ranunculuses. She was covered in tattoos, mostly of wolves, cranes, and other animals; and bore a Hidden Rain head guard under a thin curtain of brown bangs. Everything was incredible about this woman: the steadfast focus in her eyes, the gentle touch she beheld each bud with; all simply enthralling! Konan felt her heart skip a beat.

"Hn, a true work of _art,"_ Deidara gushed, "Look at those cheekbones--they could cut through _marble!_ Ooh, look how elegantly she works, yet there is a sweet _strongness_ in her complexion..."

Suddenly, he grinned, his hands mimicking his reaction.

"You should go talk to her."

"What?! Are you _crazy?"_ Konan practicaly squeaked.

She was so startled that sheets of paper were flitting off her, haphazardly floating around. She couldn't--there was still so much to plan for tonight!

"Deidara, I appreciate it, but we don't have time for this. There's a party to plan for and we aren't even done shopping." Konan protested.

But Deidara wasn't listening; instead, he was pushing her in the stunning woman's direction.

 _"Relax_ , hn," He drawled, "You worry so much about us...honestly can't you just trust me to, hn, be responsible? _Yeesh,_ I'm not a child."

He continued to drag her over, not caring about the civilian attention he was drawing.

"I can finish the shopping; just make sure you tell her that dinner is going to happen around seven tonight!"

Before she could stop him, Deidara shoved Konan into the woman, causing her to drop an armful of flowers.

"Oh, I am so sorry!" Konan cried, immediately bending down to pick up the buds.

She made sure to shoot Deidara an exceptionally icy glare, but the sunny blonde simply smirked, winking and waving goodbye as one one his hands stuck its tongue out at Konan. The other woman bent down and quickly joined the origami ninja on her knees.

"Oh, don't worry; this species is sturdy enough." She reassured with a wave of her hand.

Konan felt her pulse suddenly rush; the woman smelled like potting soil and stability, her eyes inexplicably grounded on Konan's frazzled face.

 _'How...lovely.'_ She mused once more.

"My name is Konan." She blurted.

"God's Angel? Oh, I know you!" The woman said, " I trained to learn Animal-Sealing techniques as a Chunin to someday fight for you."

Together, the other woman and Kona stood, working to set the discarded flowers into the display.

"People call me _Niji_ ," She continued, "Wow...you have a nice eye for flowers!"

Konan let slip a few comments and words of gratitude, and the other woman smiled.

"So, what's this about a dinner I heard your little friend chattering on about?"

The two women heard a loud screeching sound a few isles down, along with a muffled crash and a few civilian cries of surprise.

**_"Hn, dinner is at seven o'clock--don't be late!"_ **

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> • Fun Fact: Ranunculuses (basically Japanese Roses) are allegedly Konan's favorite flowers. They are a super sturdy species and come in a wide variety of colors.
> 
> • Niji: "Rainbow" (since I could not find a name for the female Path)


	5. ...Is All She Needs!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once again, I hope y'all enjoyed this--especially you Fauve ;) There honestly should be a Partner Day celebration for these dorks; they deserve it.
> 
> Again, happy holidays; stay safe :)

Deidara, in all his excitement, knew the first thing he had to do when he arrived back at base: tell every other Akatsuki member the great news.

"Oh, really? Are you sure?"

"Uh, _yeah_ , of course I'm sure, hn!"

"Your account seems a little romanticized."

"Don't you dare call me a liar, Uchiha! Hn, I got here as quick as I could to tell you about this spontaneous birth of beauty!"

"I'm not calling you a liar...it's just that, well, Konan must have met someone truly _exceptional_ to invite her _here."_

Hidan ducked into the kitchen--Deidara and Itachi were unpacking groceries--in search of a snack.

"Bullshit!" He objected, "Angel-face doesn't need a partner. She's perfectly happy taking care of us!"

Deidara and Itachi shot him a glare, the latter flicking a dish towel at the albino.

"Can you _not_ act like some sort of self-entitled man-child? Hn, just once?" Deidara snapped.

Hidan scoffed, "Says you!"

"How are we doing on dinner?"

The Pein Tendo popped his head past the swinging doors.

"Peachy, if you are willing to consider gossip as the main dish." Itachi replied.

The Tendo at first looked dismissive, but then his eyes seemed to dilate with interest.

"Gossip about who?" He asked.

The Akatsuki were a gossip-inducing machine; with so many connections to other villages, as well as their constant movement within the shinobi world, hot topics and current events flowed through theorginization in a steady stream. It was a necessary skill, yet often their information-collecting capabilities lead to the spreading of more _intimate_ details. In essence, private matters and rumors would spread like wildfire among the men. Was there news of the younger Uchiha? Did Sasori and his grandmother get into another fight? Was Orochimaru finally (oh, please, _finally_ ) dead?

"Konan found herself a _woman."_ Hidan drawled.

"Not just any woman," Deidara continued, "But someone who looks as fierce and beautiful as her! Ugh, it was love at his sight!"

Pein looked, much to the trio's confusion, happy. It was a slight upper curl of the lips, a new shade of brightness in his eyes.

"That might be an exaggeration; apparently they just met this afternoon at the market." Itachi added.

"Hey! Hn, it is _not!"_

"Ugh, _c'mon_ , Uchiha, don't be a fucking _buzzkill."_

Itachi shrugged and continued to lay out the leeks he was going to chop. Pein's smile, however, only grew bigger: he needed no context, no details, no explanations. He needed nothing else to know that Konan was trying to find someone for herself, someone she could love once more. That's all that Pein--Nagato--needed. He was _thrilled_ for his angel, absolutely thrilled!

"Dei, where's all the decorative napkins I put on the list?" Sasori called from the dining room.

There, he and Kisame were arranging the table and fruit platter (respectively), while Zetsu worked on an endless array of flower decorations. Meanwhile, Kakuzu sat, meticulously checking Deidara's receipt alongside his records booklet and coupon binder, snapping at Sasori or Zetsu every time they tried to set his place. Deidara's shopping habits were a _mess_...thank Hell Hidan had found him a decent calculator. 

Deidara burst into the room (to Sasori's disappointment) without the napkins.

"Konan's got a girlfriend!" He practically squealed.

Kakuzu grumbled something and closed his accounting book, folding his reading glasses with a crisp **_click!_**

"Deidara. don't be rude; she could have simply met a potential acquaintance, "He explained with a light frown, "It could be a once-off...you know love at first sight isn't a real thing, right?"

Deidara put his hands to his face, aghast. His hands made a guttural noise of disagreement.

 _"Absolutely not!"_ He cried, "Just let me tell you what happened, hn, first, before you go off and _judge_ me, okay?"

So, with all the other members within earshot, Deidara told them every detail he had overheard while spying on Konan from the dried herbs section: this mysterious woman's name was Niji; she had just graduated to the Jounin level in the Hidden Rain Academy, was a sensory type (just like Konan), had studied the origami ninja's jutsu in school, and worked at the flower shop because she had a keen interest in horticulture. She seemed to be a perfect match for Konan.

 ** _"Oohoooooh,_ _Konan's a_ _cougar!"_** Hidan snag.

Kakuzu instinctively swatted at him, the Jashinist crying out in protest.

"Shut up; they seem to be the same age. At least _try_ to keep your head out of whatever disgusting gutter you keep sticking it into, for a change." The older immortal retorted.

"Besides," Kisame added, "There's nothing wrong with that either--I mean, look at us. It's--dare I say-- _criminal_ the age gap between you and your little sociopath."

He gestured at Hidan and Kakuzu were a serving fork, earning a collective groan from the others.

"Well, whoever it is, I want you all to treat her like one of our own, if only for the night," Pein commanded, "That means no... _shenanigans."_

"Sure, _some_ of us can." Sasori said, smugly turning towards Hidan.

"Oi, go eat a dick!"

"I already did, just this morning, _thank_ you."

"I'm excited to meet this woman, though." Kisame said pleasantly.

Itachi nodded in agreement, retrieving a vegetable tray from the kitchen.

"Yes, me too. I'm sure she will be very entertained by us." 

Suddenly, the front door to the base rattled open, revealing a cold breeze and starry complexion outside. The Akatsuki immediately stopped their chattering, craning their necks and ears collectively in search of a sudden joyous sound. The Tendo smiled: laughter. He was hearing Konan _laugh_ again.

"It's time to meet the Rainbow." Zetsu whispered.

The rest of the group shushed him, intent on finding the source of Konan's uproar.

"Oh, you must be _joking!"_

"I _swear_ I'm not!"

"There is no way you knew him! He's--what? Our age? Is he really our age?"

"Yep; we took Chunin exams together a while back, before Hanzo disappeared. He was way too whiny for my taste."

Konan and Niji rounded the corner and were met by the rest of the Akatsuki, who were all staring at the pair with astonishment. Konan noticed that the Tendo had an exceptionally bemused look in his eyes. Niji stuttered in her step.

 _'They'll understand....I bet they already do.'_ Konan wanted to say, but she kept quiet.

With a burst of confidence, she put her hand on the other woman's shoulder and urged them both forward.

"Everyone," She began, "This is _Niji._ Niji, this is my...family."

Deidara and Kisame covered their mouths, letting out a not-so-discreet ' _awwww.'_

"Yes, we are her family," The Pein Tendo said, coming forward and holding his hand out, "You may know me--all of us, potentially--as protectors of Amegakure. But tonight, you are simply our guest during a holiday."

Konan had never seen the Tendo smile; she didn't know Nagato gave it such capabilities. Niji took his hand and shook it, a curious expression gracing Pein's face.

"What was it that you two were laughing at?" He asked.

Konan and Niji exchanged a look; the others held their breath in an almost giddy fashion.

"Niji just told me that she went to the Academy with Hanzo's grandson..." Konan explained.

Niji let out a laugh and continued the story; "He was a pretty evil turd; picked on kids all the time. So, I made it a mission to rearrange his bits from time to time."

Hidan and Sasori's mouths were ajar, while Kakuzu and Itachi looked rather impressed. Of course Konan would take a liking to her! The Tendo--Nagato--smiled further.

"Well, we are all glad that Konan could have someone wonderful to join us in the festivities tonight. It will be a joy to have you with us."

*********************************

And so the evening went as such: the Akatsuki ate and drank, laughed and sang each other's praises, and told each other stories filled with affection and hilarity. Konan couldn't help but shed tears of mirth; she had watched the other men celebrate Partner Day for years, standing to the side, but now, her boys were welcoming Niji--a ray of sunlight--as one of their own for the night. And maybe it would only be for the night--maybe she who sees this woman for many more nights, or every night after this. Who knew? Konan was too happy to force it.

Late in the evening, when the Jounin nin had to return to her own family, she gave Konan her contact. She also gave her the faintest of kisses on her temple, the two florists embracing ever so briefly in exchange of goodbyes. Konan, ecstatic, pulled Niji back once more, this time a longer hug and a _much_ longer kiss. Niji grinned; they would surely be seeing each other soon again.

Watching her head off, Konan's heart filled with delight, for of course they would see each other again! So when she turned in for the night, the rest of the Akatsuki passed out in their rooms or heading that way, Konan was happy, truly and blissfully happy. Because it was not over for her: she had the chance to love once more. All she had to do was search within and find her light again.

"I must try for myself this time." She whispered into the night.

And Konan fell asleep, laying in bed as paper hearts and ranunculuses danced around her and into her dreams. But before she drifted off, Konan was surprised to hear fervert whispers in the neighboring room:

 _"Shut the **fuck** up;_ _you did_ **_not!"_ **

"For the love of Hell can you _ever_ be quiet? Yes; I _told_ you I had a surprise for you."

"No, no, no, you don't _understand_ \--I made you one too!"

"...oh for the love of _Hell."_

 _"Sweet **Jashin!** _ Your handwriting really is a godsent! Ugh, it's fucking _stunning."_

"Wow...yours makes you look absolutely illiterate."

"Hah! You _know_ you _love_ it."

"Yes, I'm afraid I really do. _Heh."_

**Author's Note:**

> Ah, I loved creating this little holiday for our beloved villains! Maybe I'll bring back Konan's muse for other stuff, who knows.
> 
> I hope all you lovely folks have a happy and healthy holiday; as always, comments and constructive criticism are appreciated.


End file.
